I went to Sandton City yesterday. Well that was a good idea. Lots of people sporting the ‘business meeting at the front, party at the back’ hair cut. Awesome look guys.
I try to stay away from massive shopping centres, my sense of direction is shot, and in a place that has bridges connecting to other walkways connecting to levels connecting to lifts pretty much does my head in. After an hour of dodging ankle biters and trying to overtake lil’ old ladies, I decided it was boozy lunch time and went in the direction of the parking lot.
Sh*t.
Realising I didn’t even remember driving into the place, let alone what level I was on, I started walking. And I walked. And I walked. And I walked.
After 30 minutes, an elderly man stopped me.
Old Man: Young lady (Damn right I am) You seem to be lost.
Me: I’m not lost, my car is.
OM: Well, let’s think about this. How many ramps did you drive up?
Me: Definitely one.
OM: Then you’re on level two. This is level four.
Me: That would make sense. Thanks Old Man, you’re a legend.
So off I go to level two and instantly spot my car. Giving my car a thumbs up and a big ‘I found you, you little bugger, don’t ever do that to me again. I’m just off to repay my parking and then you and I are off home.’
Pay parking, turn around.
Sh*t.
My car has gone again.
And so I walked. And I walked and I walked. Wondering whether I was either drunk or prematurely senile, I stopped a security guard and explained that my car was playing hide and seek. He asked to see my parking ticket.
I marvelled at the wonders of modern technology. They could now tell from my ticket where I had parked. Incredible! He looked at my ticket and then looked at me as I looked back at him with a bloody stupid expectant grin on my face.
Me: And?!
SG: Yeeeeeesss.
Me: Yes what?
SG: Yes you are in Sandton City.
Me: Well good God, you’re a friggin genius.
I now had two security guards and myself wandering level two looking for my car while I held my remote up and beeped at aimlessly into the air.
Hearing a yelp from one of the guards, he proudly pointed to me car.
Thanking the guard profusely and giving my car a stern talking to, I had two minutes to get out the parking lot before the time expired.
Zooming up to the machine in record time, I turned to grab my ticket.
Which was nowhere to be bloody seen. By the time I found it, my time had expired. Not letting my car out of my sight, I parked next to the ticket machine so that I didn’t actually have to get out my car and paid for my parking. For the second time that morning.
And that, is the last time, I ever go to a shopping centre unaccompanied.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
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6 comments:
I always get lost in Sandton City - so now my cousin drops me off and I phone her when I am ready to stop shopping and I tell her what shop I am in and she comes to find me and takes me back to the car. It's taken me years to find my way round Canal Walk and only because I always park my car at the same entrance on the same level. I HATE shopping malls but boy do I love to shop.
Hahaha. That's why I never go to Canal Walk. And I make sure I always, always park on the same spot.
Hahahaha, 2 words...online shopping :) Oh wait you live in SA.
I insist that you go to Menlyn Park for your next shopping mission.
slippery little suckers, those cars. especially in mall parking lots. next time take a gps! ;-)
Bwahahahahahahaha I must tell you.....I lost my car the other day in East London, our parking lots are like half a level compared to yours!!!! When i did eventually find her i had such a good chuckle thinking of you...:)
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