IT'S ORGANS NOW

I’m nothing if not persistent. After collecting my new driver’s license card (woohoo) I was given an organ donor leaflet. Since it was so soon after my egg donor debacle, I assumed it was a sign.

Me to Wine Merchant: So I’m going be an organ donor.
WM: So it’s organs now.
Me: Yip. Say goodbye organs!
WM: What changed your mind?
Me: I sent out an email to the fam asking for their thoughts on my egg donor situation.
WM: And?
Me: My mother gave me a flat out no, The Brother said I was mentally unstable and my Dad asked me how many omelettes I was making. He doesn’t really get it.
WM: And now you’re becoming an organ donor because…
Me: Because I didn’t realise that you only have to donate them when you’re dead.
WM: What did you think they did?
Me: I don’t know. I guess I had visions of myself waking up in a bath full of ice, with a ringing phone next to me, minus a kidney with a signed receipt from the Organ Donor Foundation.
WM: Um, no. That’s not what they do.
Me: I just assumed they rocked up at your door and demanded a donation of whatever organ you had left.
WM: You know, they may not want your organs, let’s be honest, your liver isn’t looking too great.
Me: Kidneys aren’t in tip top condition either I suspect.
WM: Lungs are definitely a bit dodge.
Me: Do they take feet?
WM: Not yours.